Mood Swing?

Suddenly dun have the depressed feeling anymore... no matter alone in bus or at bus stop, there is no more those negative thoughts and sadness...
weird? mood swing?
I guess i know why i feel depressed for the past few weeks liao...
I think its on some topic we discussed over msn... its about changing over times, no confident in oneself going over to another stage of the relationship...
whenever i think of "no confident", i feel so sad and heartache... so many years of relationship seems so empty afterall, not even a bit build up his confident, so wat we did in the past years is a waste, din build up anything at all... everytime i think of this, i feel my heart aching and will start to cry... really feel like a person stand alone, seems sinking soon...

I think thats the cause of my depress mood...
A few days ago, we discussed again... this time round we have another conclusion, its about freedom... however this one seems more acceptable by me... I have wrote something like that in my blog 2 to 3 years ago...
"for guys out there who feels that they have not "played" enough, please do not consider getting married. And for ladies who are girlfriends of this type of guys, please wait more patiently till they have "played" enough..."
this is what i believed and it still will be... I will continue to wait when everybody is ready...
However I admit I am a person who needs assurance, not too much, a little will do every now and then... while waiting... I mus say I am still a normal woman, I am not a saint, can 看淡一切， 没有感觉, no expectation at all.

dear ask me a question today: why his life always pong pong pong, why others not like his... i told him its a special life of his...
I remembered when we first spoke behind a cloth in a camp, he told me that he has just came back from his Europe trip... the first thing i thought of is he must be very rich haha... the next thing i thought of is this person should be quite interesting(special)... indeed interesting, cos his life is ever pong pong pong...

I know this since i knew him, and I am continuosly learning throughout these few years how to walk together with him... please allow me to learn, please dun feel presurized or disappointed when I have made a mistake... I will still want to continue to walk this through with you forever :)

星云法师之语录（一）

Something to remind myself and remember...

1）布施可以种一收十，持戒可以三业清净。
2）忍辱可以自他得益，精进可以无事不成。
3）以言语讥人，取祸之大端； 以度量容人，集福之要术。

The Inner Side Of Me

I also don't know why... It has always been this point of the year that I feel more depressed.
Maybe becos its near to end of the year and I will start to review and think about things that happen this whole year...
I din know I am so afraid of being alone before...
Recently, everytime I took 165 to or from work and I have nothing to do in bus, I will start to think and tears will start to drop uncontrollably...
Not only in bus, its everywhere when I am alone and doing nothing...
Now I understand why Wen oso will keep thinking thinking and thinking...
Hope not many friends read my blog... if they do, dun worry too much about me...
I am still the strong and cheerful jun. (haha predentious!)
I just want to note this down in my blog cos next year I can read this again to see if this is a cycle...

Anyway as usual I am going to make myself very busy again (like wat dear mention, a pong pong pong life). I think this kind of life more suitable for me...
Things that I may be doing next year...
- give tuition
- get Java certification
- go travel (taiwan maybe, with family maybe)
- run 21km sundown marathon
- and also cont to work work work and other commitments

Another few more weeks will be end of 2009 le. By then, I shall write a review on this year resolutions and resolutions for next year...

stay happy, jun... must jia you wor... :)

Pretendious

haha... I have been hearing this word every now and then...
Who dare to admit that they are pretendious.... esp singaporeans...
let me take the head... i admit i am...
pretendious in life, in work, in realtionships haha...
without this skill really cannot live...

tiring...

another thing... not going to ask that question again... juz wait...
no more questions to be asked... no need to ask and so no need to think...
just be prepared to accept...

烦...

Thoughts...

This morning, Wen reminded me that i have not been blogging for a long time liao...
HA... indeed very long... 5 months le...
Has been busy work, tuition and other commitments....
Sometimes I love to be busy, cos this will prevent me from 胡思乱想.

has been sleeping fewer and fewer hours nowadays...
a lot of things happening these few days also... and a lot weddings to attend ha...
and yes... my dear yan now is Mrs Lim liao... feels happy for her :)

after a chat with dear 2 days ago has also set me to think a lot again these few days...
sigh... horrible de... think n think... like walking in circles again and again...
better dun think too much... who knows what will happen tomorrow... maybe i will not be in this world anymore hee, so why think so much...
so its better to 把握当下，多做一些有益义的事，不要让自己白白 的活着吧 :)

My First 10km Night Run

Haha... participated in the Sundown marathon last Saturday... finally got time to blog...
ran alone this time round, however the run was quite nice...
running by Changi beach, nice sea breeze except got barbecue smell haha...
dun quite like the return route too, hopefully the organizer can improve on this next year :)
my timing was not too good too, hee walk quite a bit...
muz jiayou and train harder le...

This is the picture at the starting point, use handphone to shoot de, quite bad...


These are my 战立品, so happy ha.... like the visor a lot hee...

8th blood donation

Yes... 8th time le... huat ah... haha
but this time nearly black out again in a crowded train, think I was lack of oxygen that time...
anyway everything is fine now...

The process of the donation this time round is fast... thanks to a nurse at HSA called Mdm Kang Ah Jee...
She is very experience, so hit on my small vein on my right hand at one go and tar tar...
everything goes on smoothly...
no after effect, no blue black, no pain :) Thanks to her.

I think I will look out for her again in my next donation (9th one) :)

Another Dream Fulfill

Nice and peaceful place...

Interest vs Career

Juz came back from a secondary school gathering...
I was discussing my recent changes with a friend...
Then we discuss about whether we should put our interest as careers?
Hmm...
Once an interest becomes a career, will you be sick of it?
I think some will say yes and some say no...
However in the end both of us agreed that we will not put interest as careers because for me, I think I will be sick of it soon. Then there will be no interest anymore, so nothing to destress le...

Anyway still in deep thoughts... think think think

Singapore Trip 2

Another place to guess haha...

Clue 1: Airport???

Clue 2: This picture is the answer for previous post.

Clue 3: Spider Web???

Happy Guessing Again :)

Singapore Trip 1

Haha... Guess where is this place?
These are the clues:
(1)
(2)

(3)
Should be quite easy to guess bah... Happy guessing :)

Dover Park Hospice

I went to visit my grandaunt at Dover Park Hospice today...
Poor her... she is 87 years old already yet was infected with liver cancer...
her skin color becomes yellow and her stomach is bloated... can feel that she is in pain...
sigh... she is so old already but still has to deal with this...

so young people out there, please watch out for your diet and exercise regularly....
take good care of your health, dun make yourself suffer when u are old...
cos the people around you will also suffer...

Places To Visit

Haha... Since I am so free now, there are few places where I hope to visit in Singapore...

1) Marina Barrage
2) Singapore Flyer
3) Keppel Bay
.
.
.

Cannot go overseas during this time, so be a tourist in singapore lor lol
Any friends who wish to join me to these places, send me a comment or send me a sms haha...
Hopefully I will be posting some pictures in here soon :)

One Minute Of Silence For DBS CEO

I was at one of the POSB branches in the afternoon.
A notice at the entrance caught my eyes - POSB will be observing one minute of silence at 2.45pm when the mass of DBS CEO starts.
Indeed, at 2.45pm, one of the staffs explained to the customers who are queuing up to get their transactions done at the counters, that all their staffs (including the counters' staffs) will be observing one minute of silence. During that one minute, all transactions stopped. However, everything resumed after that. I believe this should all be happening at all POSB and DBS branches, includes their Head Office at that point of time.
This was the first time I observed this. I always thought that a bank will not stop any of its transactions for anything because time equals to money. To be truthful, I was a little touch for what they did. You might say that its because its their CEO mah. Yar.... true but... i still find this touching :)

Bad mood

has a very bad mood today...
also angry... wif myself...

ps: dear frens who are reading this blog, please dun ask me about what happen...
i just wan to 发牢骚 here and bury everything after a good night sleep... so dun bring it up again...
(Look Up)
dun worry... tmr wake up will be a good day again :) Cheers!!!

The 7-Ups

Ha.... 7-ups... No no, its not a kind of drink...
Its Seven Up's to a Great Marriage....

These are for myself and also to friends who are happily attached (be it married or going to be married or not going to be married yet) ha... Cheers :)

They are:
1) Light up - No matter how tired you are after work, you still must light up yourself to communicate with your spouse.

2) Dress up - Always dress up to "impress" your spouse every now and then.

3) Stand up - Always stand up for your spouse in whatever situation (Even if your best friends say bad things about her/him).

4) Start up - Always start up your day with your spouse in a bright way (no matter whether one is a late sleeper and the other is an early waker)

5) Shut up - Shut up when it is necessary. (There is some (hurtful) words that need not to be said, ie, you won't die if you dun say those words)

6) Pull up - Always be there for your spouse to pull him or her up whenever needed.

7) Look up (ahead/forward) - Always look up to the future. (Do not drag on to the past)

Note: Above is my own definition, with contribution from my bro and his gf.
Wish those of my friends who are getting married soon have a blissful marriage :)

Southern Ridges Trip

The Southern Ridges - The Southern Ridges comprise a 9-kilometre chain of green, open spaces spanning the rolling hills of Mount Faber Park, Telok Blangah Hill Park and Kent Ridge Park before ending at West Coast Park. (http://www.nparks.gov.sg/cms/index.php?option=com_visitorsguide&task=parks&id=62&Itemid=73)



Finally got to have some time to go walk walk with dear. We spent around 2 hours plus on a Tuesday afternoon to walk from Harbour Front to HortPark. Luckily quite good and sunny weather that day.
What I like best is still the Henderson Wave, at least 36 metre above Henderson Road. Quite windy up there.
Its a tiring walk but I still find its worth it for the scenery up there :)

30th Anniversary

My god... I juz go and see wat have I done for dear last year....
jialat... think this year me very jialat... hee
till now me haven gt him any pressie... then even for dinner, I din really plan anything...

feels a bit nei4 jiu4, what am I doing man haha...
went to vivo juz now to look for his pressie... but dun have leh...
hopefully can go out wif him this week to get the pressie... jia you :)

如燕

词曲：陈佳明
编曲：Terence Teo
制作人：陈佳明
演唱：Olivia Ong

愿意合上眼才能美梦无边
别让悔熏乌了从前

也许碎片才能让回忆展颜
何妨瓷花拼凑明天

谁带我寻获幸福的模
却自己谜中困锁

谁为我留下缱绻的天涯
信物是抹晚霞

Chorus:

思念如燕它飞舞舌尖
若是真爱配尝几分苦甜

意念婆娑时间里推磨
追随到何处才结果

燕如针线在青空缝编
几幅女红将以泪缀点

誓言斑驳情雾只是经过
风雨中且让我盈步婀娜

Review and 2009 Resolutions

Yeah... its time of the year again to review past year's resolution and set new ones (a bit late this year)...
Checklist for last year resolutions:
1) Continue to participate in marathons.
Checked, participarted 2 marathons in 2008 (SAFRA and Standard Chartered)

2) Complete all the tasks at work, meaning to be more organised, focus and determined.
Checked, at least finish the big project ha.

3) Upgrade skills and knowledge.
Checked, started to pick up Korean language. Not easy but will work hard.

4) Be more supportive and responsive about dear's stuff.
50% checked, I think (Don't know dear agree on this percentage or not hee). Have to work harder on this ha, maybe can be less stubborn on certain stuffs.

Not bad bah, at least 3 out of 4 checked ha.
*************************************************************************************************
Anyway, time for new resolutions. Nothing much, shall set only 3 resolutions this year.

1) Able to get the job that I wanted to do.
I really hope to get that job. I will continue to work hard to gain more experience and knowledge. I also need to read more to improve on my language skills.

2) To stay healthy and happy.
Continue to jog and participate in Marathons. The first one shall be the Adidas Sundown Marathon in May 09, then the Standard Chartered in year end. Also have to eat more fruits and drink more water :)

3) Continue to be supportive and responsive about dear's stuff.
Will continue to give support in any decision he made.

Pple, have a fruitful 2009 :) Yeah!